Covey’s Habit #5, Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood makes you vulnerable to the reality that the conclusion you may have brought to the table may not be the one your integrity allows you to stick to. Once you sincerely empathize, and with feeling understand what the other person’s situation is, how their personal story affected their intentions, it’s more difficult to “stick to your guns.” The latter phrase apparently came as a command for a military sailor to stay with his gun even while under enemy fire. (Idiom, 2014). Synergize, Covey’s 6th Habit builds on the understanding that empathic listening allows. There is no way that you can view someone who doesn’t share your views as an enemy, if you have sincerely put yourself in their shoes. To synergize means you actually seek out diverse opinions with the expectations of outcomes far more sophisticated or creative than you initially suggested. Surrounding yourself with like-minded people is appropriate as it regards working toward a common mission, but is less than courageous if you want to set the stage for truly powerful alternatives. Exploring the reasons behind objections can shed light on your own assumptions, and open the door to an entirely new direction. The work you spend in understanding one another, within the bounds of a trusting culture, slingshots you past the perceived limiting beliefs that individuals bring to situations. In a class meeting “issues” form, students are able to check a box to let the group know if they simply want to get the problem off their back, receive feedback, or suggested strategies to try out. The last option is the one that takes the most courage, because at follow-up meetings we ask if those strategies worked. I can commit to encouraging with consistency, that students opt to consider seriously the strategies coming from kids with whom they don’t usually mesh. To help them realize that walking the path they don’t select for themselves can get them to a calmer, more powerful place. References Stick To Your Guns - Idiom Origins. (2014, March 22). Retrieved November 21, 2016, from http://idiomorigins.net/stick-to-your-guns-origin/
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